In this Issue

Feature Article

Top Ten Reasons to Hire a Personal Coach

Teleconferences

Workshops

Chat Room

Quote of the Month
“Of all the things successful people do to accelerate their trip down the path to success, participating in some kind of coaching program....
--Jack Canfield

Tip of the Month

Book Review

Women Men Love, Women Men Leave: What Makes Him want to Commit
by Dr. Connell Cowan & Dr. Melvyn Kinder

Relationship Q&A

Store

About Kim Olver

Subscribe to Inside Out

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Upcoming
Events

Click on title of class for more information and to register or visit
www.TheRelationshipCenter.biz
ALL TIMES IN EST 

Teleconferences

All teleconferences are one (1) hour in length unless otherwise stated and all you need is a telephone. When you register we will send you a phone number that you will call five minutes prior to the start of your teleconference.  You will have the opportunity to ask questions, but if you prefer to just listen that’s all right too. You do not need a computer or Internet, only a telephone. Don’t delay. There are a limited number of slots available. 
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The following teleconferences
are FREE (except the parenting teleconference series)

Click on the link for a full description and to register

Relationships
the Choice Theory Way

On-going teleconference, offered the second Tuesday of every month. Anyone can join in to learn about creating more effective relationships or to get relationship question answered.

Next Class:
May 8, 2007
8:45 - 9:45 p.m. EST

Anger Management
May 29, 2007
8:45 - 9:45 p.m.

Do you have trouble controlling your temper? Do others tell you that you have anger management issues? Are you someone who is confronted with angry people in the course of your life? Spouses, children, extended family members, neighbors, community members who have tempers and like to yell at you? Want to learn ways to take the wind out their sails and have them communicating more cooperatively? Then this class is for you!

Relationships from the
Inside Out
June 5, 2007
8:45 - 9:45 p.m.

Learn the skills you need to create the relationship you deserve. Learn about the seven deadly relationship habits and how to replace them with loving and caring habits. Start improving the relationship you have with your significant other by registering for this amazing class today.

Goal Setting & Attainment
July 2, 2007
3:00 - 4:00 p.m. OR
8:45 - 9:45 p.m.

For those of you who are having less than stellar performance with accomplishing your goals on your own, you have another opportunity to get the support and accountability you need to be successful.

Are you serious about attaining your goals this year? Do you want to do more than make a New Year's Resolution that you forget by the time the Super Bowl is on television? Join me on the free teleconference to learn my time-tested 7-Step process for Goal Attainment. We will do more than set goals--we will discuss a system to implement that will exponentially increase your opportunity for success.

Empowerment Parenting
July 3, 2007
8:45 - 9:45 p.m.

You cannot continue to parent your children the way you did when they were younger children, or even the way your parents parented you. The world is different! Children are different! If you do not learn new innovations in parenting, your efforts will likely be ineffective at best, and actually destructive at their worst. Join us for this teleconference and learn about the inherent conflict between parents and their children, as well as ways to circumvent it. You can reasonably insure your child’s safety and still maintain a positive relationship.

Inside Out Thinking
July 24, 2007
8:45 - 9:45 p.m.

Do you find that your happiness is often contingent on people, circumstances or things that you have no control over? Do you feel like life is just passing you by while you wait for.... Inside Out Thinking is such a powerful way to unleash your personal power in a big way. Take control of your life.

Foster Parenting Teleconference Series
Six (6) Week
Teleconference Series
May 7 - June 11, 2007

Six (6) Week teleseries. Click on link for more information or to purchase. Foster Parent Agencies - Please click here to order this teleseries

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Workshops

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Click on the links for more information and to purchase

Self-Development
with Choice Theory
4 1/2 days - Monday - Thursday 9:00 a.m. - 4:00 p.m.
Friday 9:00 a.m. - 12:00 p.m.

July 30 - August 3, 2007 Chicago, IL
Prairie State College—Matteson Center

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August 7 - 10, 2007
York, PA

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October 8 - 12, 2007
Chicago, IL
Prairie State College—Matteson Center

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Chats

All times listed in EST

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All Chats are from
7:30 - 8:30 p.m. EST

May 8, 2007
May 15, 2007
May 22, 2007
May 29, 2007
June 5, 2007

Inside Out

Personal Edition
“You can't change the direction  of the wind. . .
but you can adjust your sails!”
             ---Jimmy Dean

Kim Olver, MS, NCC, LPC

www.TheRelationshipCenter.biz
Kim@TheRelationshipCenter.biz

May 3, 2007, Volume 3, Issue 5

This Month's Feature Teleconference

Empowerment Parenting Teleconference Series

Six (6) Week Teleconference series
Beginning Monday May 7, 2007 and ending on
June 11, 2007 from 8:45-9:45 PM EST

You cannot continue to parent your children the way you did when they were younger children, or even the way your parents parented you. The world is different! Children are different! If you do not learn new innovations in parenting, your efforts will likely be ineffective at best, and actually destructive at their worst. Join us for this teleconference and learn about the inherent conflict between parents and their children, as well as ways to circumvent it. You can reasonably insure your child’s safety and still maintain a positive relationship.

Each teleconference will be recorded and you will receive the link to the call within 24 hours of the date of the teleconference.

A Message from Kim

Hi Everyone,

I hope your month has been going well. I want to let all of you know that my blog is back up and working now but I lost all my old blog entries. If you want to visit, just log in to www.therelationshipcenter.biz and click on the blog link on the left. It will take you to my new and improved blog. It is now hosted by typepad and it has much greater security. Check it out and leave me a message. I will respond personally.

This month my focus is on coaching. Coaching is a relatively new way of seeking help and direction for your life. I have three different coaches in my life. I have a business coach, a publishing coach and a success coach. What I can tell you is that I have accomplished more with these coaches in my life than I ever would have without them.

Do I consider myself to be self-motivated? Definitely! Do I think these coaches taught me something I couldn't have learned myself? No. However, having coaches cuts down on your learning curve. I could definitely have figured everything out myself but it would have taken a lot more time. I learned from experts how to do those things I didn't know how to do. It made all the difference.

The Relationship Center provides relationship coaching. We have male and female coaches who can help couples improve their relationships, parents to motivate their children with self-discipline, and individuals who want to make improvements in their life or their interpersonal relationships. We know relationships. We have studied the information out there. We have worked with thousands of people in the area of improving their relationships.

Can you figure it out on your own? Probably. But how long will it take? Why not go to the experts to cut down on your learning curve. If you have relationships that aren't working in your life, have you stopped to figure how much time you spend on those problems? How much time do you invest in thinking about it? How much drama to you have because your relationships aren't functioning well? How much time do you think this takes away from the important things you were meant to do?

We offer a free 20-minute coaching call or a special rate of $75 for a one-hour introductory coaching session. Give it a try and see if you can't see the value of coaching. I found out I couldn't afford NOT to have a coach. For your free 20-minute coaching session contact me at (708) 957-6047 or email me at kim@therelationshipcenter.biz.

Feature Article

Top Ten Reasons to Hire a Personal Coach
By Kim Olver

 
Have you considered hiring a personal coach? Jack Canfield, in The Success Principles says hiring a "personal coach is one of the best-kept secrets of the successful."
 
1. A coach can help you clarify your vision and goals. If you have a sense that what you are doing isn’t the thing you really want for your life but you don’t have a clear vision of what you do want, then a coach can help you get clear. 

2. A coach can support you through your difficult times. Sometimes, all you need is someone to talk to who isn’t too busy, too distracted or too involved to just objectively support you when times are tough. If you feel you just need someone to talk to who understands and doesn’t judge you, then a coach can help. 

3. A coach can assist you in developing momentum. How many times have you started something, felt good about it but then lost interest, never to return to it again? A coach can help you sustain that momentum and keep you focused on the prize. This is similar to hiring a personal trainer to help you sustain the momentum of exercising when you feel like doing something else.
 
4. A coach can help you stay on track and be focused. Have you ever let the little, unimportant things take control of your day and by the time the day ends, you realize you haven’t accomplished anything you were hoping to accomplish? A coach can help you stay focused on the important things while learning to delegate or dump the unimportant things. 

5. A coach can help you take an objective look at exactly what you have been doing. A good coach will ask you to take a close, and sometimes painful, look at what you say you want as compared to the things you are actually doing.  Do you see a match? If you continue to do things the way you are, will you get to the place you are hoping to reach? Coaches ask the hard questions. 

6. A coach may help you identify both effective and destructive behavior patterns that you may not see. Since the coach isn’t standing in the forest, he or she can typically see the trees that you don’t. How often do you continue the same destructive patterns over and over again just because you can’t identify them? A coach will help you see this more clearly. 

7. A coach will hold you accountable for the goals you set. A coach is not a babysitter. When you decide you want to get going and accomplish some things in your life, a coach will not accept your excuses for why it wasn’t done. Making a public declaration of your intent will also provide you with the needed incentive to keep your commitments. 

8. A coach can show you how to accomplish more by working less. Coaches are adept at teaching time-tested systems for being more productive. Did you know that research shows that the average 8-hour-a-day worker is only productive for 1-2 hours a day? A coach can help you be more productive in less time.
 
9. A coach can help you discover your true passion. Do you ever wonder about your unique abilities and what your life purpose is? If these are not questions that you even think about, then you really DO need a coach! We all have unique abilities and a purpose but some of us never discover them and the rest of us who do are too afraid to just go for it! A coach can help you uncover your passion—the thing that will make you excited to get out of bed in the morning. 

10. A coach can help you identify your core values and show you how to live in synergy with them. The values by which we live our lives are very important to each of us. Many times, certain values you hold may be in conflict with each other. Sometimes, you are not even consciously aware of the values of importance to you. A coach can help you live your life in accordance with your values. This will provide the kind of life of which you can be proud.
 
You will be able to do far more and in less time than you could ever have imagined with a coach than without one.
 
I know. After I left my 9 to 5 job to begin my coaching career, I floundered around for six months. I knew I wanted to hire a coach, but I thought I couldn't really afford one and I didn't want to hire just anybody. I thought there needed to be a good match between us.
 
I hired three coaches---one to help me build my business, one to teach me marketing and one to help me write my book. Hiring each one of them was the best thing I could have done. Yes, I could have learned it all myself but hiring the coach helped me cut down on my learning curve. In hindsight, I now realize I couldn't afford not to hire a coach.
 
If you are serious about taking your life to the next level, then find the coach who is right for you. But don't delay. Once this day is gone, you cannot get it back.  

Click here to read some of Kim's articles

Quote of the Month

“Of all the things successful people do to accelerate their trip down the
path to success, participating in some kind of coaching program is at the top of the list.
A coach will help you clarify your vision and goals, support you through your fears,
keep you focused, confront your unconscious behaviors and old patterns, expect
you to do your best, help you live by your values, show you how to earn more
while working less, and keep you focused on your core genius.”

--Jack Canfield

Jack Canfield is the the author of the book, Success Principles. As the co-author of the wildly successful series, Chicken Soup for the Soul, he knows a thing or two about success. He knows that coaching is a great way to move yourself forward in your life. I know that relationships are one of the most challenging areas in our lives and the area where we are least likely to seek help.

What do you have to lose? Try one of our free 20-minute coaching sessions today. It may be just the thing you need to help you strengthen that relationship with someone critically important in your life.

Book Review

Women Men Love, Women Men Leave: What Makes Him want to Commit
by Dr. Connell Cowan & Dr. Melvyn Kinder

This book is interesting in that it is written by men about the psychology of men in relationships. I haven't come across this approach before in all the books and material I have reviewed on relationships. The authors provide an interesting look into the personality profiles of five types of women that men won't commit to and then provide advice on how to stimulate and maintain interest and commitment in a man from a man's point of view.

I think this book would be particularly good for women who wonder what a man really wants and how he thinks. Also, if you are a woman who seems to always come up short in relationships, this book may provide you with some ideas why. There is hope. The book will help point you in a direction that might increase your possibilities for commitment.

Click here to order book

Tip of the Month

Many coaches will ask you to clarify your goals and to get crystal clear about what you want but there are very few who will ask you the question, "What would you have to give up to be successful at your goals?" There are almost always unconscious needs that are subconsciously sabotaging our successful achievement of the goals we consciously set. When you can ask yourself the question, "What would I have to give up to get what I'm saying I want?" and listen honestly for the answer, you will receive some critical information.

Armed with this new conscious information, you may decide to alter your want, try to find a solution that has some of what you want and some of the thing you think you will have to give up, or completely decide in order to get what you want you have to totally give the other thing. Whatever the case, you will have taken the subconscious sabotagers out of the darkness and moved them into the light where they become easier to manage.

Relationship Q & A

Question: What's the difference between coaching and counseling?

Answer: I get asked this question a lot. One big difference is that I don't accept coaching clients who might require some type of crisis work. Coaching is really not conducive to that. Coaching is geared toward people who don't have serious psychological problems. They generally know what they want to do but want to accomplish things faster than they might on their own. Coaching clients are typically motivated to change and to improve their current level of functioning.

The coaching client determines the length, frequency and duration of coaching. The coach may make recommendations but the client is in full control of his or her financial commitment.

Finally, another big difference is that coaching generally occurs by phone rather than in person. Finding the right match between a client and a coach is a challenge that would be made even more difficult if the two were tied to a particular geographic area. Also, coaches and successful clients tend to have very busy lives and meeting face-to-face is an unnecessary inconvenience.

Coaching is always strength-based and goal focused.

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