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Is Your Child Not Responding to You the Way you Hoped? |
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Dear Moms, Dads and Caregivers, When my sons were 13 and 15 years-old, my husband died of cancer and I had to raise them alone. Initially, things were totally out of control. My husband had been the disciplinarian in the home and I was the total pushover. I was the understanding parent who was as permissive as my husband was strict. You might say together we balanced each other out but imagine what happened when he was no longer there. Chaos! All I can say is without the concepts of Empowerment Parenting, my children and I would have been lost. It truly saved my life and probably the lives of my children. In order to successfully navigate the dangers of childhood, children require a healthy balance of discipline, love, respect and support. |
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Improve your relationship with your child, while maintaining your parental role and your meeting your responsibilities. |
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Enhance communication with your child so you’ll know what is really going on in his or her life. |
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Learn to use the language that your child is most likely to hear to enhance your effectiveness. |
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Teach your child how to make good decisions even when you are not around. |
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Get the cooperation and respect you deserve from your child. |
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Learn techniques to prevent your biggest fears from occurring. |
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Disengage the innate power struggle and strategically align with your child’s resistance to leverage your advantage.
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Many parents, when faced with a child going through a difficult period, will ask, “Why do I need to change? I’m not the one with the problem.” In effect, that question is all wrong! Who is it with the problem? Does the child come to the parent and say, “I really think I need some help to better control my behavior. I’m a little out of control!” I don’t know about you, but those were never words uttered in my house, although I believe they were certainly true at times. Who’s the one with the problem? Who’s the one experiencing discomfort with the situation? I’m not asking who is “misbehaving”; I’m asking who is in the most distress over the events that exist? You are—the parent. That’s good. Now that problem ownership has been identified, the next question is fairly simple. Whose behavior can you control? That’s right. Whose behavior are you able to change? If you were able to change your child’s behavior, you probably wouldn’t be reading this entry right now. Sure, you may be able to raise the stakes or make the punishment so severe, that your child will do what you want, but at what cost? What does it do to your relationship? Also, what do you think he or she does when you aren’t around to see? And if you are still holding fast to the belief that you can control your child’s behavior, have you ever attempted to feed a baby who didn’t want to be fed? Enough said! Whose behavior can you control? That’s right. Yours! So, if you have a problem situation, what is the most logical thing to do? Again, you already know the answer! Decide what YOU can do differently to affect change in the situation. You can certainly keep doing what you’ve been doing but you are likely to continue to get the same results. How are they working for you so far? How much longer do you want to keep getting the results you’ve been getting? That’s the reason you need to look at changing what you are doing. When you do, you tap into that awesome power within you. Your power source comes from focusing your energies on the things you can control—your own thoughts and behaviors. When you do that, you can achieve tremendous results but you have to give up the notion that you can force others to do things your way. Once you do, there’s no telling the effects the adjustments in your own behavior will make. Give it a try. What do you have to lose? |
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Five Reasons to take Action Right NOW:
1. No Risk! Only $19.95 for a two (2) hour workshop! Where is the risk? 2. Save Time! The task of raising your child is not going to magically get easier. Don’t waste precious time to learn the secrets of navigating this time period without frustration and aggravation! 3. Save Money! In this workshop you will learn some incredibly powerful parenting secrets that will put you back in control and ultimately improve the quality of your relationship with your child. Counseling will cost hundreds of dollars a month. This class cost only $19.95! 4. Your child will begin to share information with you! When employing Empowerment Parenting, your children will know that you are supporting them in getting what they need and will begin to see you as an ally instead of the enemy. Because you have more information, you will be better able to help your child avoid the trap of dangerous situations. 5. Empower your Child! You will be able to teach your child the skills he/she needs to make critical decisions gradually on his/her own with which they are faced when you are not around. Empowerment Parenting is about helping children assess the pros and cons of decisions with which they are faced. You gradually add more freedom, as they gain responsible behaviors to manage that freedom. In so doing, your child will learn to make good decisions, while still having your support at home. |
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If after reading this letter you still aren’t convinced, you have more questions or simply want some more information, please email kim@TheRelationshipCenter.biz or phone me at 708-957-6047. I will be happy to talk with you. Make today the day you want it to be!
Kim Olver |
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Coaching for Excellence
www.Empowermentparenting.com Copyright © November 2006 Kim Olver. All rights reserve |
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· Are you currently a parent, step-parent or someone responsible for the parenting of a child? |
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· Concerned about keeping them safe while they navigate dangerous times in their lives? |
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· Concerned about maintaining a positive relationship with your child as they grow older? |
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· Do you sometimes wonder who your child has become? |
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· Are you at a loss at what to do differently? |
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· Are you just holding your breath waiting for the latest storm to pass? |
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· Does punishment seem ineffective with your child? |
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· Are you someone who simply wants to maintain the already positive relationship you have with your children? |